Even Strong People Cry

How many times have I heard this, ‘You have a strong personality’.

Yes, I do. And at some point, I am really proud of it.

But behind that ‘facade’ is a little girl who wanted to be hugged. Behind that overpowering character is a young lady waiting for someone to realize that she is fragile, that she is – after all, a human being too.

I take challenges as if it is a puzzle to be solved. Most of the time, I get out of the ‘maze’ – on my own terms. But that doesn’t mean I don’t cry in the process – most of the time in the comforts of my own home.

Strong people get hurt. And we get hurt so bad because such doesn’t really happen a lot. 

Strong people get tired. And when we get tired, that means it has gone overboard. 

Strong people cry. And when we do, it’s because it pains us already. 

Strong people fake their smiles. Because we are expected to be strong even if at times we are at our weakest. 

And when these things happen, we question ourselves, ‘Where do we run to?’

For someone who’s the shock absorber, who’s going to absorb ours?

I sometimes think, should I cross the fence and just choose to be weak? Maybe by then, more people will realize that this strong person has soft spots too. That beyond that brick-like personality is someone in need of a simple question like ‘How are  you?’

…Or maybe, we weren’t strong after all. Because we fear to be weak.

 

 

 

 

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Pay It Forward: Spending A Couple of Hours at Nazareth, Bahay Pag-Ibig San Pablo City (Home for the Aged)

It has been months, or maybe years, since I dreamt of organizing an event. With the support of my family, we were able to make it a reality.

This month, we went to Nazareth, Bahay Pag-Ibig, a facility that caters to older people.

Truth be told, it wasn’t hard to organize knowing that we only wanted a small gathering for them. Here’s what we did.

1. Coordinated with the organizers on the date, headcount, and the every day things they need.

2. Asked my relatives to contribute small amounts of cash.

3. My auntie volunteered to do the grocery shopping while I stayed in touch with the coordinator for the final details.

4. One of my aunties prepared the soup and asked other volunteers to come with us.

5. We were supposed to have a program but due to technical difficulties, we had to scratch it off. That was actually a good thing because we became more ‘personal’ with our lolos and lolas.

We had mixed emotions after our small event. Of course, we were happy for being able to put smiles on their faces. At the same time, it tore our hearts knowing that some of them still have their families who just stopped visiting them.

A couple of hours might be too short for some, but it’s enough for us to feel such strong emotions.

And yes, we’ll continue this act and pay it forward.

Trust God’s Plan and You Will be Fine

I just want to share with you my quick story where I gave my full trust to God.

Ok, so almost lost my job because a lot of writers for the company that I work for submitted mediocre write-ups. Our manager was furious and decided to kick us all.

I was a bit sad because the money from that ‘raket’ was supposed to be for my son’s birthday. I had no idea where to get extra money and of course, I still have bills on the way. For some reason, I was calm when I heard the news. I prayed and asked for God’s guidance. I said, “I am lifting everything to Him”.

After an hour, I received a message that I will still have my job back and that I am one of the best writers in the team. I needed to do a last ‘test’ to have my job back and apparently, got it.

During my exam, I asked God to send me the Holy Spirit to help me get through it. AND I DID!

I am not saying that you just sit down and wait for His plans to materialize. You have to do your part. As cliche as this may sound, You do your best and God will do the REST.

 

Good night!

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Stop Calling Working Moms Lazy!

I am not your traditional mom who stays at home, washes the dishes, irons the clothes, teaches my kids after school and …well,the list goes on. (you get it right?)

I am one of those moms who need to work twice as much because apart from the dirty dishes, we need to earn and settle the bills.

Here’s a secret, though. I wanted to quit my jobs to focus on being a traditional mom… And this feeling often happens. I wanted to take such role because I am certain on how exhausting yet fulfilling it is to be one.

If only I have an option.

If only I can relax and stop all the expenses.

Reality check, in cases like mine, we need to hustle because as clichè as this may sound, money doesn’t grow on trees.

Sad to say, there are still closed-minded people who believe we are incapable of becoming good moms just because we are holding reports and not pans most of the time.

I have few questions to those who belittle working moms.

-Why is it so easy for you to tell that a mother is lazy if she opted to work in front of the laptop and not in front of the stove?

-Why do you judge moms as if they are incompetent when they can’t fold shirts and iron pants?

– Why do you give them looks of disapproval just because they can’t regularly review the kids from school?

– Why can’t you understand that we have different lives and in our case, we need to work to survive?

I say, stop branding us ‘Lazy’ or even ‘good for nothing’ just because we don’t fit your description of being a mother. We salute the hands-on moms, but you need to know that it is not easy being a working mom too. We have our own battles and the least we can do is to support each other and to not drag us down just because of our differences.

It’s about time to celebrate all kinds of mothers whether she’s wearing a bun, or sporting a purple hair.

 

 

 

How do you deal with rejection?

At 28, I have had my fair share of rejections. I’m talking about failure in multitude aspect of my life. But you know, these failures are just doors to create something better. It’s just a matter of how you look at it. Use your failure as a stepping stone!

I am not telling you that it is bad to get sad. But let me tell you what – give yourself a couple of days to mourn and then that’s it.

Get a pen, plan and get your life back on track.

Why I decided to Leave One of My Jobs – Hint! Because Money Isn’t Everything

I have multiple jobs. It’s not just because I am a workaholic. It’s because I want to give the best life my kids could have. Yes, their father supports them but to be brutally frank about it, it’s not enough to give them the life I have imagined. Thus, I used to have 5 jobs (excluding my sidelines for real estate and training gigs).

It came to a point that I earn more than those who are living and working overseas. In fact, I can easily get a car or house and pay for it without worries. Sounds cool, right? I mean, I get to earn well and at the same time, travel ‘poshly’ without spending so much. But believe it or not, I chose to drop one of my jobs – and this one can give me the best travel perks imaginable.

Why? 

1. There’s no point of working from home if you do not spend time with your kids 

Since I needed to juggle multiple jobs, I have jeopardized my time with the kids. I can only talk to them for less than an hour per day!

Not good.

When they grow up, I want them to remember me as someone they can talk to or play with, and not the mom who was a bit monstrous every time they attempt to talk to me while I finish some urgent tasks.

2. If you are not passionate about something, or at least happy with what you do – just leave! 

My family and friends know how passionate I am about work. But if I get emotionally drained, that’s when I leave.

Some people say that I am brave to do such. Maybe?

I guess this is one of our society’s challenges. We try not to leave our jobs because of emotional stress. After all, we have our responsibilities that will not stop even if we decided to leave our work. I’m starting to believe that we are afraid to leave our jobs because we feel that it’s the only thing we are good at and we are scared of new adjustments that might hit your finances bad.

I think, what we need to do is to invest on new learnings and use those to jump into a brand new career. This isn’t easy. But then again, I’d rather have enough cash on hand than carry an emotional baggage.

When you resign, rest for a while. But I don’t mean that you have to ‘slack’. Use the time to think of another strategy that will help you leap further.

3. Money isn’t everything, most especially if you have learned to live a simple life 

Teach them how to be #independent. #parenting

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If you know me, then you are probably aware that I love everything simple. I love simple clothes, simple gadgets and simple life in general. That kind of attitude was magnified when I became a mother and decided to instill the same principle to my kids. I think it works because I am proud to say that my kids do not easily get envious if other children have better and more expensive toys. Plus, they would thank you even if you buy them the cheapest ones you can find. They are not after the price, but they are after the value and the reason behind your gifts.

My daughter would always say this after I give her my gifts or ‘pasalubongs’.

“Did you buy this because you love me?”

I would, of course, say YES! Because I really do. And that’s her cue to hug me. Ahhhh, priceless!

Again, this doesn’t mean that I will stop looking for means to make it big somewhere. In fact, I am going to this huge conference few weeks from now, with high hopes to establish a network. Plus, I am back to learning the trends of Real Estate and finally break a sale which will allow me to build my own training camp. Well, that’s the plan for now. It is ambitious (I know) and it will be tiring. But at least I will get tired and exhausted for things I am happy about.

I guess what I am trying to say is that, you don’t have to drown yourself in things which will suck the fun out of your system. Of course, I am not pushing you to quit easily. But always try to gauge your boiling point. If there are things or people that you think are not beneficial for you, leave. The universe has so much to offer. Attract the ones that will make you happy. After all, what’s the use of being alive if you won’t live?

 

 

 

Who are we to complain?

Are you always complaining about your life? Always seeing the bad side of things?

Well, have you tried turning the table around and see the great things about your life? You, being alive, for that matter.

You see, our happiness will not rely on other people, not on material things, nor on our achievements. If you always find reasons to complain, nothing will make you feel cheerful.

Watch my short video earlier today about my thoughts about regularly complaining  ☺