Why I Don’t Gauge My Kids Based on Grades
When I became a mom and my son started going to school, I already created a mindset that I wouldn’t push them to get skyrocketing grades. What matters to me is that they learn, they do what they do best, and that their social behaviour develops properly.
Why am I writing this post?
I know some parents would push and sometimes force their kids to get good grades. While there is nothing wrong about having great grades on the report card, I sometimes feel that as parents, we should allow our kids to enjoy school, most especially in the first years. Forcing them to get straight As at the age of 4 or 5 is never going to be fun! Except if your kids really show the interest in such.
Where am I coming from?
Let’s backtrack a bit and you know, give you an idea where I am coming from.
I used to be grade conscious. I remember being one of the top students in the class, crying over an 86/95 score in an exam. It wasn’t healthy. For me, my ultimate goal was to get good grades, and not to learn. Obviously, that’s not a good motivation.
Ask yourself again, “Why would you go to school?”
If you answered, to get good grades’, I sincerely think that it is a shallow reason.
Going back, I got tired of it and come 3rd grade, I was not included in the honor list.
For a 9 year – old, the world shattered.
And then 4th Grade Started
For some reason, I felt that I was quite mature for my age. At the age of 10, I told myself that I wouldn’t force myself to get high grades. Instead, I decided NOT to stress myself on academics and just focus on things where I am good at.
I was good at speaking and singing. I have bagged awards year after year (and I think my batchmates were already tired of hearing me sing). Kasi even the national anthem during the flag ceremony, ako na yung kumakanta! Anyway, I even represented my school in big speaking competitions and won. Trust me, it wasn’t your usual competition where you’d already know your standing. It was hard and it was months of preparation. I knew I was good at it, so I worked my arse! Yabang noh?
Point is, I knew back then that the school is much more than Science and Math or whatever subjects we had. I was a firm believer that we have different kinds of intelligence. Mine was a bit more on the artsy side, you know – music, linguistic and interpersonal intelligence. Sometimes I wonder why I got in the Science Curriculum section. Brad, yung mga classmates ko sobrang talino! Haha
I don’t want to make this post very long because I have a call in 30 minutes and I need to finish my reports. Again, I’ve seen parents getting sad because their kids were not able to make it in the top list. But for me, we have to show them that grades are not the gauge for success. You have to set an example that you believe in them, regardless if they get a 100 or a 75. For me, the traditional schools can measure a minute part of one’s intelligence. But boy, the world is so big and your kids have so much to offer.
From there, see which areas your kids are good at. Then hone it.
Imagine this, they are improving their skills, while enjoying their childhood. Don’t torture them by feeding things which they are not yet ready to swallow. Although, I suggest that you help them create a study habit. Ah, which reminds me, can you help me with this one?
From your young WAHM, Love you, moms!