Making the Best Decisions in Life – Is There Such?

Since I work online, going out of our house is a treat for me. It doesn’t matter if I go to the nearest mall, or if I visit my friends nearby.

This weekend I visited a young mom who happens to be my cousin too. It was great because 1) I saw her cute kids 2) I was able to think of a topic for my post. Hi Lara! Congrats. 🙂 

We started talking about our decisions to work from home and/or to work overseas. Unfortunately, here in the Philippines, more people will need to work abroad should they need to earn more.

Obviously, I am working from home. My cousin used to work overseas but decided to stay here for a while because she had to give birth. We have opposing ideas in some areas, but came up with a solid conclusion. What have I learned from our conversation?

S-A-C-R-I-F-I-C-E

Regardless if you work from home or if you work overseas, you will sacrifice some things. In my case, I will have to work harder to earn more money. That means, I need to look for other source of income if I want to give my kids the life I wish for them to have. My weekends aren’t my ‘rest’ days as I need to dedicate some time for my ‘rakets’.

Now, working overseas doesn’t mean money will come easy. But I’m sure you would agree with me if I say that in most cases,  you can earn more if you work outside this archipelago. The hardest part of it though is that you’d spend number of nights crying yourself to sleep and missing important milestones of your kids.

Which one is better?

Well, it depends actually. We have different perspectives in life. I chose to work here because I want to make sure that I see my kids during their formative years. Some would leave while their kids are still young so they could save enough in the future. That means, they could go back just in time when their kids enter puberty stage.

We may have different opinions but one thing should be kept in mind. In all your decisions, you must consider your kids. And you have to ensure that you will squeeze out all your resources in order to compensate what you might lose.

Let’s just take the work from home/ work in Philippines vs. work overseas ok?

If you are leaving: Is it because you want to give your kids a good life and at the same time, save for the future faster?  What’s good about today’s technology is that you can always talk to your kids without spending so much. We have Skype, Viber, Facetime and all those apps. There should be no excuse not to communicate with them. Yes, there might be time difference, but what’s an hour or two to talk to your kids? Ask them about their school, or how their day went by. Give them words of wisdom and encourage them to be open about their lives.

But what I notice about some parents who work abroad is that they shower their kids with expensive things. It’s ok if you do this once in a while, but if you do it on a regular basis, chances are your kids will have this sense of entitlement. It’s not going to help them as they grow older. I hope you get that. Give them what they deserve. You might feel that the expensive things will compensate the time you are not with them, but you are wrong. Being a good provider isn’t equal to being a good parent. It’s a part of being one, but shouldn’t be interchanged.

If you are staying: Is it because you feel that you can survive with what you earn and that you can think of ways to have more savings? Are you ready to engage yourself in different businesses or ‘sidelines’? Apparently, this is the choice that I made. I am confident that I can make it big here. I do not earn much from being an online writer but I try to engage myself into other businesses (I’m in Real Estate, remember? So if you need my services, you are welcome. Haha! Promotion at its best! As they say, “Para- paraan lang yan”).

But of course, if I really need to leave for reasons we don’t know yet, I would. For now, I think I have made my best bet.

So what am I trying to say?

In life, we always have to make a choice. To be honest, there is no best choice. You know, the ‘one-size-fits-all’ thing? That’s not true. Haven’t you noticed that? There will always be a missing piece. In the case above, it can be the time for your kids, missing milestones or working double to ensure that their future is safe. But make sure that if you have already chosen one, you are prepared to sacrifice and to compensate. That’s how it should be.

If you are having doubts in making decisions in general, talk to other people whom you think can give you valuable inputs. In my case, I try to talk to other moms (the seasoned ones and the new ones). If you are having doubts in putting up your business, talk to those who have already established theirs. Share your thoughts and the decision you are about to make. Yes, there will be people who will be saying NO. Don’t feel bad about it. I mean, I am sure they have reasons why they challenged your ideas. Consider their thoughts, maybe they have a point. However, at the end of the day, it is your final word that will matter. Make sure you will weigh everything first. ‘Bahala na’ attitude can be fun and that ‘uncertainty’ gives us the thrill, but if you are doing something that will affect your kids, I’d rather avoid that mentality. ***

So, my son will have his final exams tomorrow. I guess I need to review him first.

BA is a young mom of 2 wonderful kids. She has high ambitions and would like to touch hearts. If you wish to write her a message, please send it to ba_isla@yahoo.com   

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